Ignorance

“In this difficult days when each morning filled with heart broken and each evening filled with confusion and anxiety. Why unfortunate things happen to me? Why people hurt my feelings and not realize doing it? What did I do wrong?”

We are all suffering in this life. But what is the greatest suffering can happen to us? We suffer from lacking money; suffer from unhappy relationship; suffer from physical diseases; we suffer from attachment on to something; we suffer from wanting and grasping more and more..  To me, the greatest suffering is: not knowing that we are suffering. This all comes down to the behavior pattern of ignorance.

In most cases, people are afraid that they will lose the opportunity to get more money, so then they work every single day to make sure they catch all potential opportunity to get money. Ignoring the fact that they need to rest and they need to make time for themselves. Ignoring the fact that the body needs to take a pause. I would rather choose to be able to take a pause and then work efficiently.

Most problem that happen in many generation is that: we all repeat the same life pattern that has happened before us. Including all mistakes and difficulties. Unfortunately, most of us not aware about this because we are too busy with our daily activities. We are too busy with our anxiety and worry, we are too busy avoiding or denying our life. So that we don’t even have time to take care of ourselves and understand what is actually going on here?

It is all mostly easy to say, but hard to do.

Chat with me: skype: wijayav | instagram: @viawijaya.yoga | whatsapp: +628176881511 | via.wijaya@gmail.com | facebook: https://www.facebook.com/viawijaya.yoga

 

 

Emotions VS Feelings

What is the different between emotions and feelings? Emotions (E-motions) is some kind of fast moved reaction/ immediate feedback to a situation. For example, your lips will say, “Ouch!” when you accidentally hit your finger with a hammer. Or you may shout to a person who accidentally step on your toes. While feelings are hidden down deep in the heart, and it is only sometimes can be felt through a realization and understanding, normally comes up after a deep contemplation or with the help through breathwork. Feelings are very private, while emotions are more common.

“Feelings is the bottom of the ocean, and emotions is the surface part of a wavy tide.”

In my understanding, feelings are built up from emotional experiences or planted by a traumatic situation. A person who has lost their parents or has lost the person they loved so much may experience deep grief and sadness. A child who has experienced childhood abuse may have feelings of deep insecurity and fear. Unfortunately, our behavior are based on these feelings. A child who has experience abusive contact from their parents may become an abusive person in their adulthood, and without realizing it they hurt other people. It is because this child has deep fear, insecurity and anger. A person who has deep grief may become a sad person and feel their life is not worth it and experience sadness, anxiety and worry in their daily basis.

Generally people hurt other people, because they are hurt inside. But, most of us don’t realize this. We have learned to avoid feeling the pain. We have learned not to admit the pain that we have. For many reason, mostly because other will judge us, we hide our pain in a sacred place. We are so afraid if other people will find out about our pain. We feel embarrassed having pain, and feel shame if other find out.

Take sadness for example, have you felt sadness before? Do you have sadness? How does it feel? Can you describe it?

Note: On our breathing practice, we categorize emotions as a form of distraction. It is similar to physical/ emotional sensations.

 

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Distraction

“With the highest honor to all of my teachers, students and friends. I would like to tell you all that I am not interested in experiencing sensations while doing my practice. I’d rather listen to my breath and let my thinking mind concern about what’s happening on the physical level rather than allowing my thinking mind wonder around and take my concentration away which destroy my practice entirely. I would love to experience the real feelings of lost and gratefulness, the real feeling of guilt and forgiveness, the real feelings of sadness and love.”

Feelings are profound and simple. Understanding feelings allow us to learn how to respect ourselves within what we do. This practice also allowing ourselves to understand that each of our life time is precious, so we can spend our life time to benefit ourselves and those who we love.

Unfortunately, no one teach us earlier how to get in touch with our feelings. Instead, most of the people around us and the society teach us to bury the feelings deep down inside our heart in the place far away to reach out. That we must peel-off layers after layers before we can get to the deepest feelings which reveals who we are.

For those who has never done breathing practice or even for those who have done the practice for a long time will find distraction along the practice. This is normal, because the body automatically refuse to experience the feelings (for many reasons). Imagine when you are threaten by a tiger, your body will automatically freeze and closed up. Same within the breathing practice. The healing journey of being open and vulnerable sometimes can be scary and surprising. The only way to get through is by having an open heart and surrender to receive and let go, allow the heart to take the lead.

Distraction happens when the feelings are almost arrive. It comes on different form of sensations. Distraction can manifest in physical sensations like dry mouth, dry tongue, dry throat, stiff neck, stiff jaw, light headed, arise heat or cold, tingle, itchiness, numbness, tremor, pounding chest, and many more; or emotional sensation like feelings relax, feeling “gone somewhere”, feeling nice, etc. Not only this, the thinking mind is very clever (but the heart mind is far more intelligent). The thinking mind will bring new ideas for life or new ideas about concept, or manifesting is different kind of thoughts that will distract your concentration to your breathing.

“To me it’s really interesting. Sometimes I feel like something is crawling on to my arm, but then when I open my eyes there is nothing on my arm. The body is super intelligent.”

The body struggle so much not to let the feelings happen, because the body knows that it will be painful. The body knows that it will be hurt. The body knows that before the release happen, it has to get through the crisis of profound confusion, painful moments that makes it not wanting to allow the feelings to arise.

Quoting from my good friend, “Just before the release happen my neck was so stiff, the back part of my legs was so painful. It feels like I just finish with a hardcore Ashtanga class. But then, the release happened and I cried so deeply. At that moment the pain is all gone.” – Lilik Manuaba.

When dealing with distraction, it is all about your intention. What do you want from your practice? That is what you will get from your practice.

Chat with me: skype: wijayav | instagram: @viawijaya.yoga | whatsapp: +628176881511 | via.wijaya@gmail.com | facebook: https://www.facebook.com/viawijaya.yoga

 

 

Open Class Feb 2017

“Experiencing compassion” is probably the best tittle for this practice. Togetherness, caring, and understanding others is also part of the practice. As most of us have experienced loneliness or feelings of separation and unconnected, this day was a good day to practice and reconnect with other.

Thank you all for sharing.

healingbreath-openclass-feb17

Chat with me: skype: wijayav | instagram: @viawijaya.yoga | whatsapp: +628176881511 | via.wijaya@gmail.com | facebook: https://www.facebook.com/viawijaya.yoga

Retreat at Landih (2016)

One of the greatest honor is to practice is such a beautiful space. Healing Breath Bali practiced at Landih Ashram, Kintamani offers a profound experience. The space is located in the center point of Mount Agung on the eastern part, and Mount Batur in the western part. One of the strongest melting point from the essence of nature to meet up!

Healing Breath Bali practice was started with pray, meditation and blessing, fascia unwinding, and then continue with introduction, breathing practice, and summarized with open-heart sharing. Support activities of the practice include asana practice, a walk to coffee plantation and fun day out. The 15 participants, mix foreign expat and local Balinese and Indonesian citizen create a deep bonding to each other.

Thank you all for sharing.

Chat with me: skype: wijayav | instagram: @viawijaya.yoga | whatsapp: +628176881511 | via.wijaya@gmail.com | facebook: https://www.facebook.com/viawijaya.yoga

Understanding and Expressing the Feelings

Our feelings create who we are, our behavior are based on our feelings towards life. Our words are shaped from our feelings towards the world and people around us. Our view of life is based on our feelings on day-to-day basis, and how we feel about ourselves. Are these not enough reason why we need understand our feelings?

By understanding the feeling of “fear” for example, then we become aware and notice the feeling of insecurity and anxiety towards life is caused by this “fear”. By understanding the feeling of “sadness and grief”, then we become notice and aware about the reason why we become sensitive and feeling hurt for most of the time. By understanding and admitting the feeling of “guilt”, then we understand not to create and project that guilty to other people and not continuously making the same pattern of being the victim.

Remember that law of “attract – manifest – project”? We are all the time projecting our feelings to others, especially our significant others; our husband, wife, parents, children, etc. Thus we attract similar feeling to arise within them and at the end manifesting the feeling that we have expected. However, the feelings we have created are not always good for them, sometimes we project our insecurity or fear to them as well. So, by understanding, admitting and expressing these feelings completely and fully, we don’t need to carry them around anymore.

The feelings that have been expressed allow relieve to happen in the physical state. Thus, the body feels more comfortable and more relax. And, in mental state, helps the mind to become more settle, calm and peaceful.

Chat with me: skype: wijayav | instagram: @viawijaya.yoga | whatsapp: +628176881511 | via.wijaya@gmail.com | facebook: https://www.facebook.com/viawijaya.yoga

The Feelings

“Just like the ocean have the taste of salt. This teaching has only one taste, the taste of freedom.” – Buddha.

Only when we understand our feelings which create range of thoughts. We can have the independence to let this thought arise and pass away. Just like all things, suffering or satisfaction, all things will arise and pass away. When there is a start, there always be an end.

We might be confused of feelings (comes from the center of your heart) and other “feelings” that mostly mentioned on our daily activities. Feeling hungry, feeling tired, feeling sleepy, feeling lazy …. these are different from feelings like: sadness, fear, hatred, envy, ruthlessness, indecisiveness, selfish, greed, panic, insecurity, frustration, embarrassment, guilt; including feelings of love, compassion, joy, self-respect, enlighten, sympathy, caring, wisdom, security, and so on… these are the feelings that we never talked about, and yet never been admitted nor expressed.

We, human as animal have natural instinct, like hunger, or wanting to mate (producing offspring/ children). However have the capabilities to reach out the “higher-state”of understanding feelings. Understanding the “deeper feelings” can helps us view our world as what it is, both create happiness or suffering. These feelings have been brought since the beginning of our birth. Indeed we have tendency to learn one or two specific feelings stronger/ deeper than other feelings (from our parents, or our significant others). Or even some of us have the tendency to learn not to feel anything, or to shut our feelings throughout our lifetime.

The feelings that we meant was feelings are like rage (deep anger), envy, ruthlessness, indecisiveness, judgmental, frustration, resentment, selfishness, self-pity, self-center, shame, fear, shock/ trauma, lonely, panic, confuse, hysteria, insecurity, narrow minded, vanity, sadness, grief; including the encounter feelings of love and appreciation, wisdom, self-respect, joy, self-discrimination, openness, assertiveness, clarity, awareness and understanding, sympathy, compassion, humility, equanimity, contentment, peace of mind, wisdom, security, open-minded, easy going and so on. These are feelings that for some reason within the time of our lives has been incubated inside, and for some reason sometimes we are not allowing ourselves to feel or admit nor express these feelings completely and fully.

Ask yourself, how do you feel now? Do you understand the feelings of those words mentioned above?

Other important note to understand is that feelings are different from emotions. Emotions are the quick feedback/ response on certain situation, while feelings has lied for a long time within a self, down deep in the center of heart. For example: “angry people are angry because they have had anger inside them. And that anger might be caused by them being hurt.”

Chat with me: skype: wijayav | instagram: @viawijaya.yoga | whatsapp: +628176881511 | via.wijaya@gmail.com | facebook: https://www.facebook.com/viawijaya.yoga